Dear Dave: Am I wasting my time?

Dear Dave,

I don’t know if I am the only one thinking it, but sometimes I feel my husband bad mouths me to people he wants to please. I don’t know why I have this feeling.

He talks about me and it is not always good stuff, especially to ladies he feels may support his agenda to fool about.

At first, it was his family. When his friends and siblings visit, I kill myself to serve them the best way possible and it’s like they were expecting me to do better. They can be having a discussion in Twi at home, but the moment I step in the house, they switch to their mother tongue.

Then some of his best friends, the female ones, sometimes want to give me attitude, even in his presence, because he will switch moods himself when he is approaching those friends. I don’t know the point he is trying to prove but it offends me.

I will try to gently whisper a message or conversation with him to feel loved and wanted but he would ignore my attempts to make me look stupid.

He tells people I am strong with my opinions and expectations. His female friends mock me because of the way I wear my makeup. I found out on his phone that he has been telling some of them I look ugly in my makeup.

Dave, the makeup I wear and the way I wear it has been the same as the first time he set his eyes on me and told me I looked beautiful.

Everything I do now is not good enough and will piss him off with the slightest provocation.

A few months ago, he was telling a lady he chats that he wished he was single again. This is a man I don’t stress in anyway. I don’t ask him to buy me this or that, I perform my wifely duties and I cook delicious meals for him. I care for the children the best way possible, and I keep the house very clean and homey and peaceful.

Why is he making me feel like I’m wasting my time?

Source David Bondze-Mbir
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